Eb E
	How do you do, I
     F# G
	See you've met my
     Ab A
	Faithful handyman.

     Eb E G  Ab A A

     Eb E
	He's just a little brought down
     F# G
	Because when you knocked
     Ab A
	He thought you were the candyman.

     Eb E G  Ab A A

     Eb E
	Don't get strung out
     F# G
	by the way I look.
     Ab A                         Eb E
	Don't judge a book by its cover.

     Eb E
	I'm not much of a man
     F# G
	by the light of day
     Ab A                              Eb E
	But by night I'm one hell of a lover.

        E          B
	I'm just a sweet transvestite
            A                      E    Eb E
	From Transexual, Transylvania.

     Eb E
	Let me show you around
     F# G
	Maybe play you a sound.
     Ab A                                Eb E
	You look like you're both pretty groovy.

     Eb E
	Or if you want something visual
     F# G
	That's not too abysmal,
     Ab A                          Eb  E
	We could take in an old Steve Reeves movie.

     Eb E
	I'm glad we caught you at home,
     F# G
	Could we use your phone?
     Ab A                              Eb E
	We're both in a bit of a hurry.    Right.

     Eb E
	We'll just say where we are,
     F# G
	Then go back into the car.
     Ab A                             Eb  E
	We don't want to be any worry.

     Eb E
	Well you got with a flat,
     F# G
	Well, how 'bout that?
     Ab A                      Eb E
	Well, babies, don't you panic.

     Eb E
	By the light of the night
     F# G
	It'll all seem alright.
     Ab A                     Eb E
	I'll get you a satanic mechanic.

	E          B
	I'm just a sweet transvestite
	    A                      E    Eb E
	From Transexual, Transylvania.

     Eb E
	Why don't you stay for the night?  Night.
     F# G
	Or maybe a bite?  Bite.
     Ab A                            Eb E
	I could show you my favourite ... obsession.

     Eb E
	I've been making a man
     F# G
	With blond hair and a tan
     Ab A                             Eb E
	And he's good for relieving my ... tension

	E          B
	I'm just a sweet transvestite
	    A                      E    Eb E
	From Transexual, Transylvania.        HIT IT! HIT IT!
	E          B
	I'm just a sweet transvestite, Sweet transvestite
	    A                      E    Eb E
	From Transexual, Transylvania.

	E	(with a slide!)

				 E
	So - come up to the lab,
				    G
	And see what's on the slab.
					 N.C.
	I see you shiver with antici ...
		    E
	... pation.

			   E
	But maybe the rain
			       G
	Isn't really to blame.
		                  A
	So I'll remove the cause.
			                E
	(chuckles) But not the symptom.